Right, I need to talk to you about something important.

Something fundamental – indeed, a recent commentator said it was an essential element for a civilized society.

What is this vital topic you may well ask?  Loos.

Lavatories, WCs, Restrooms (if you’re in the USA), bathrooms, even Toilets if you prefer.

Did you see the story about the lady who locked herself in a public loo for three days as a protest about its proposed closure?

Whilst I wouldn’t quite go that far, I do believe that Public Loos are essential and much needed.

But can I also just say they need regular monitoring, cleaning and maintenance?

Is there anything worse than finding yourself ‘in situ’ only to discover that there’s no loo roll?

I’m sure it’s not just me who first checks to see if there’s paper before committing to a cubicle.

But, sometimes there’s a massive queue in the Ladies’ loo, so you don’t have a choice in cubicle selection.

This is where a packet of tissues – an essential component of my handbag – comes into its own.

Don’t even get me started about where you’re supposed to put your handbag while on the loo.  If you hang it on the hook on the back of the door you risk somebody trying to swipe it.  Yet hanging it around your neck is a potential safety hazard, particularly given the weight of most bags these days.

I won’t name names here, but my family and I recently went to a well-known (in fact, award-winning) tourist destination over the county border.

All was well until we needed the loo.  There we found the most hideous excuse for bathroom facilities I’ve had the misfortune to discover in a long time.

Firstly, there were only two loos at the entire place – one each for men and women.  No paper in the Ladies was bad enough.  But then there was no soap either at the communal sink, and everywhere looked like it needed a good clean.

Simply disgusting, particularly as this place likes to market itself as an ‘upmarket’ day out, complete with a range of dining options and prices to match.  Quite frankly, there’s no excuse either.  It was early in the day, so I shudder to think what they looked like after a day’s use.

Now, I’ve been to other tourist destinations where they obviously take pride in their loos and hygiene.  The facilities are checked every half hour, any ‘spillages’ are mopped up, and the soap and paper is refilled as required.

When you pay a small fortune for the privilege of visiting these places, is it too much to expect them to provide soap and loo paper?